SITE HAS BEEN MOVED!!!

Hi everyone! I got kinda tired of wordpress not letting me fiddle with HTML so I moved my blog here!

http://thejlexperience.tumblr.com/

checkit!
NOW!

jL out!

flacid phone D:

I desperately need to….

…

…

get a new phone!

It occured to me when I was hanging out with some of my friends at BBT. We were chatting it up, haveing some good times laughing about some random topic. And then this familiar scene happened…

“That’s awesome. Hahahaha!”

“hahahaha”

“heheh”

“heh”

*whips out phone*

Whenever this happens I always feel… small D:

Now I don’t think my phone is bad. I only use it to call and text, so I don’t really need anythign sophistacated! Plus it doubles as an MP3 player! Which is pretty bad ass! ALSO, I can put customized ring tones :D

Pretty good right?

Sadly… not D:

Every time the conversation dies between my friends, it means it’s time to whip out the celly and text, play with apps, or check something in this “G3″ network. And then I sit there, looking from phone to phone. I then sheepishly whip out my inadequecy…

*sigh*

THIS CONVERSATION HAS NO RELEVANCE TO MAN MEMBER AND MAN MEMBER ACCESSORIES

I know what you’re thinking you jackasses!

This problem also occurs when I am left waiting for a person.

For example, I arrive a little early, or someone is late to our rendezvous point. So I am left standing there… waiting…

I hate waiting >:(

It makes me feel like a loser. And being the egotistic dbag I am, I always think that people are looking at me wondering why this creepy dude is just standing outside the building.

So I whip out the phone.

However, being such an ill-equipped phone, it has nothing of value to offer me!

I got no apps to play with and all my games are demos D:

And I refuse to fake text!

So when I whip out my phone people can soon recognize that I am just avoiding awkwardness since… my phone sucks ass!

In these situations I usually jsut call a friend :D SO MUCH BETTER THAN FAKE TEXTING

Maybe I should just carry my DS with me so when awkwardness hits…

I’ll whip out POKEMON and own me some rattatas!

gotta catch’em all suckas!

jL out

most entertaining jog

Having nothing better to do after work, and not wanting to waste such a beautiful day…

I got home

Whipped off my pants

Put on my short shorts

and went for a run :)

Now this was not an off-the-cuff decision, I was driving back home (oh that 30 min drive) and during the whole drive I had a mental debate about whether I should run or not. It wasn’t a very elaborate discussion, but tough none the less! It went a little something like this…

“I should run…”

“fuck I hate running…”

“but it’s so sunny outside!”

“fuck I HATE running…”

“but you get to be all healthy and stuff!”

“FUCK I HATE RUNNING!”

“fuckin run you fat douchebag”

So listening to the psycho asshole in my mind, I whipped off the pants and put on the shorts. Now before I could run, there is one IMPORTANT thing I always have to have before I do any exercise. The Playlist

Now for a run, I always like to stack my playlist with a lot of fast paced rock and rap songs. In my mind, listening to a hardcore song makes me want to just run like a mother fucker. Some of my most effective songs are:

Readymade – RHCP

Skeptics and True Believers – The Academy Is

DOA – Foo Fighters

Misery Business – Paramore

Here we go – Pitbull, Dirtbag, Timbaland

OH and don’t forget… the Power Ranger THEME SONG :D

Basically, I need my soundtrack to make me feel like a total badass. So I can go like… Ef you small lung capacity! This guitar solo basically makes me HEMAN master of the universe! Suck it!

So I got my music blasting, my short shorts groovin, and I’m setting a good starting pace for my run around the block. I was doing pretty good, though I lost my breath like 5 billion times throughout the run… I did not vomit. I pride myself on that :]

But during my run, I did not expect to see the entertaining things I did.

1) During my first stretch I apprached a fellow jogger. She was having a tough time, breathing heavy, and doing that thing where she’s bent over and waving me off kinda saying “go on without me!”. Now the most entertaining thing about this girl was that she was wearing light up shoes! I remember wearing those way back in elementary school. Those were so bad ass! I can only imagine how pissed off the teacher was when every other second she would see a random flash of light as I stomped my foot just to see the lights.

2) As I ran past the park, I saw this grown man on the playground. Now I don’t knock that… cause on more than one occasion I have been known to take over playgrounds to play the oh so lovable game of “lava tag”. Or “grounders” as you vancouverites like to call it. But the funny thing was this grown man was using the monkeybars to do pullups :D This idea crossed my mind before. As I do not want to invest in my own door bar. But this guy was 6ft tall on a 5ft monkeybar. His knees buckled and lifted off the sand. Good thing pedowatch wasn’t there cause it looked hilarious!

3) School was out and I saw some school kids at a bus stop. I hate running into younger kids while I exercise. I know in reality they probably won’t notice me, but being extrememly vain… I always think that they are talking about me. However, the entertaining thing about these two was that I guess the boy was trying to make a move on his girlfriend? Or something, but the girl saw me jogging towards them, breathing heavy, eyes delirous from being so fat. But I could see the boy’s hand slowly, oh so slowly go for her butt. And then the girl did the most entertaining “fuck off” slap to his hand. Like a mother spanking away a kids hand from the cookie jar. I couldn’t help but laugh :D which probably wasn’t the best idea cause she then gave me angry eyes D:

4) as I was approaching my house, on my last stretch of roadwork. There were a group of kids walking in the back alley of my street… singing Justin Bieber… enough said!

I think I’ll try this new fad called jogging.

I believe it jogging or yogging…

it might be a soft “j”

jL out!

Britney Spears got nothing on me! (another cover!) D:

I got bored

Today I got off work very early! It was super suprising that I didn’t close today…. and so when I got off work… I was at a loss to what to do!

The last couple of weeks I haven’t been eating that well, and I was definately feeling the consequences. My body felt angry at me and was giving me sucker punches to the rumbly tummy whenever it was inconvenient D: So, today I decided to make a gigantic health bowl of pasta. Too bad I got carried away, so now I have 3 giants bowls of pasta sitting in my fridge…

I take that as a challenge it finish that shit in 3 – 4 days :D

Anyways, I got bored after cooking, and after a small chill session with some random friends, I get back home early and I pick up my guitar…

…

…

bad idea?

You be the judge :D

No… wait…

terrible idea D:

jL out!

turn that frown upside down!

After a long day of working and coaching, I looked at my empty fridge and decided it was time to get myself some grub.

Going to SUPERSTORE and buying a shat load of food (GOOD DEALS! :D)

Anyways, as I was going towards the cashiers, I started to think about how damn hard life is at the moment. I’ve been working every day for the past 6 months. No time-off during christmas, and with this late olympic rush, I could feel myself start crashing.

However, as I was rolling up with my food, there was a baby chillin in a cart waiting with her dad. This baby was the cutest thing EVER! She totally turned me from being blue, to feeling pretty damn happy.

I love babies!

Wierd thing though, this cute baby came from uncute parents. I dunno how that happens, but it seems to happen a lot. I see some wierd looking couples (being polite i just call them fugly), but they are rolling in with the MOST ADORABLE babies. I thought genetics say that cuteness should run in the family. Or maybe the parents grew up being beaten by ugly sticks? In either case… babies make my day.

And out of aaaaaaall babies… I think asian babies win :D

You rarely ever see an ugly asian baby! I have definately seen some super fugly white babies fo sho! But asian babies are so chubs, with big cheeks, small clueless eyes, and hair that just goes everywhere. Super SUPER cute.

I also see some parents with those baby leashes. Those things entertain me so much. Not the ethical use of it, but the hilarity that the babies are always thrown back by the leashes. Like the parents don’t tug or do anything mean, it’s just the babies try to run away and touch something, but get to the end of the leash and you can see them just try to stretch and reach what the want with all their might :D

One last thing, I find it hilarious when babies cry. They cry with so much passion, like the world is ending RIGHT then and there. But it only lasts for like 10 seconds, then they just look confused. Their faces are kinda like…

“WTF just happened? did I just cry? Why is my face wet?”

then the proceed to cry :D

effin love babies!

jL out

Happy Valentines! plus an original song by yours truly :D

Hello cyber world!

Happy Valentines Day!

Though this day might be one of the most hate/love relationshipped holiday ever… (that’s right I used “relationship” as a verb)

I couldn’t help but appreciate the overall happiness in the air today :D

This day inspires so many intense emotions in people…

For the lovers of the day, the sappiness, cutsey, over-the-top PDA is done in pride. And they can’t get enough of it.

For the haters of the day, it inspires deep set anger issues. You can see them with their super judgemental stares at anything boy, girl, or even red. ManBulls… without the balls D:

Anywho, that wasn’t much of a segway but I made a song :D

Thank you to everyone that helped me with your honest opinions :)

CHECK IT!

Now I know what you are thinking… BUT

THIS SONG is not about a person! :D

I wrote this song about a jacket. This is how it all went down.

I was shopping in Coquitlam with my friend Jane, and was looking for a specific jacket. You know when got a picture in your mind of exactly what you want, and you go to every store trying to find it. However, everything you see is wrong. Even when you finally see something similar, it has a random design flaw that totally throws off the whole thing!

And you think to yourself…

“What the ef… I know this is out there.. it has to be! It’s NOT THAT COMPLICATED”

truth is? It is FUCKIN complicated.

Just like love quests :D

Happy Valentines everyone!

jL out!

the last word

I remember… waaay back when I was still at St. Andrew’s Elementary school

I was sitting in the gymnasium with all 150 kids in my school listening to some teacher giving a presentation.

Now this may not be very interesting… but when the presentation was over, this would always happen…

how juvenile :D

This situation, for me at least, relates to a certain… discomfort I have with not having the last word.

I would be having a perfectly great conversation… the topic is interesting… we share laughs… we gain insight into each others worlds…

But then you can feel the conversation starting to hit the brakes. It usually starts with a weak laugh, or an awkward pause. Then one of you try to resuscitate the conversation by trying to add something extra to the last conversation topic. Almost a 90% fail there too!

Anyways, when the conversation does end, I can never be the one without the last word. It feels so awkward not having it!

I’m not being egotistical I swear!

For example,

I am terrible with goodbyes. Even when I say it first, then the other person says it back to me (out of courtesy of course), I always feel compelled to say goodbye… AGAIN

I think it might be because I grew up with parents that constantly gave me orders…

Do this! and Do that!

And they would always ask if I understood them. Of course, I would say “yes” in return. Thereby confirming the relaying of information. If I didn’t answer it would always come back 10 fold! Parents would always ask if I got it, then question why I was cheeky enough to not answer in the first place…

Then probably a ritual asian beating with the chicken feather stick! D:

With this sense of responsibility of confirming information, I always feel bad “leaving people hanging” on the conversation. I feel that if I don’t get the last word, they will always be thinking “and then…?” or “so…..?”

And whenever I don’t get the last word. I always get anxious thinking, “did that conversation go well? I hope they don’t think less of me!”….

Add this one to my psycho file D:

jL out!

wordle – find your name!

So I found this website through a facebook link

http://www.wordle.net/

and I have been entranced for the WHOLE DAY!!

so I will post my first wordle of many :)

This is an early salute to everyone who has made my Vancouver experience the awesomeness it has been so far :D

enjoy!

jL out

shower power (guy vs gal)

freshness :D

So during one of the first weeks I started living in my new place, my friend Jacquie asked if she could stay over for the night. Of course, being the complete gentleman I am, I obliged. It was pretty chill, we played some games, talked about the Vic life, watched a movie…

Then she asked if she could take a shower…

I thought everything was alright with my place. It was basically brand new. Big kitchen, had a bed, a table, got the chairs, and a brand new bathroom! However, Jacquie came out of the shower looking completely disappointed.

“Totally a guy’s bathroom…”

Now whaaaaat the fuck does that mean?!

Apparently, my bathroom was not up to standard D:

I didn’t know what was wrong… I mean… I got shampoo, soap, a loofa… WHAT MORE CAN YOU WANT?!

Apparently…

A LOT

Fast forward a couple months to today. I am having another conversation with my friend Jane… and this is how it started…

“

jon // says:
hiiii jaaaane

-jane. says:
heyyyy jon

jon // says:
whatchu doing :]

-jane. says:
i just had an amaaazing shower
i exfoliated my feet and legs with a sea salt scrub, lathered off the oil with a moisturizing shower gel, cleaned off with my lovely smelling rose, honey and oregano lush soap, exfoliated my face with an apricot core scrub, and lotioned all over with my moisturizing tinted lotion..
and i feel amaaaaaaazzzinggg

jon // says:
OOOOO
party
in your bathroom

-jane. says:
big party

jon // says:
woowooo!

“

For starters… I didn’t know about half of the things she was referring to. I thought showering was simple! After 21 years of experience… I do consider myself an expert on the subject!

Step One: Get naked

Step Two: Get wet

Step Three: Shampoo yo head

Step Four: Soap loofa and party!

**that’s what she said to steps 1, 2, and 4**

However, I was proved wrong. APPARENTLY, I don’t got a clue how to shower properly!

After hearing how Jane’s shower went… it left my own shower time leaving me with a feeling of….

..

disappointment

What is usually the best part of my day was shattered by the realization that I have not maximized my bathroom experience!

I need to get on this shit RIGHT NOW

I mean I don’t know what “sea salt scrub” or “rose, honey, and oregano lush soap” is? (is it foood D:)

I JUST KNOW I WANT IT

I want it all!

Dammit Jane!

*sulking*

jL out

life update

So I haven’t written anything on this blog for a little while…

So I’m just gonna publically update everyone on the comings and goings of my life :D

I haven’t been too busy lately, rolling with the punches as they say. Work has been steady, it’s nice to know I don’t have to work crazy 50 hour weeks anymore. The days off are relaxing as I can sleep in and not wake up thinking…

“Holy shit… 5 minutes till I need to peace this mutha out!”

and

“EFFFFFFFFLAAAAATE!!!!!”

Also skipping the breaky meal is kinda lame. I wrote before that I don’t really like breakfast. Though it is true, I can’t deny that I do need to eat in the mornings. If I don’t I get some rediculous belly sounds that truly define “rumbly in my tumbly” :(

As for work, it’s starting to pick up again. It’s funny when sometimes there are no shoppers and my coworkers and I just slack off and chat, when a HUGE shit load of people come down the escalator and royal rape our department. Some people need to find the deceny to learn how to use a hanger properly. And not complain that the place is a mess when the bitch is the one who tried on 5 different sizes saying..

“I am sooooo not a double XL”

Alls I got to say to you ma’am… is you a fatty… and put down that sandwhich!

I have recieved that new guitar from my buddy Leah. And so I aptly named my new stringed friend as such. Playing Leah, I have now been trying to cover a bunch of new songs and I quickly come to realize my terrible passion come back again. Don’t be suprised to see my amateur chords hit the tube. On the side note.. I think I am getting a little better at least. Though every single time I come up with a pretty good riff, I can never put the words to it. I guess I need a lyricist :D

The lack of having a piano is getting me down a little. When I was back in Victoria, I would spend countless hours in front of my piano testing out chord combinations, making simple songs that could rival the complexity of Snow Patrol songs. It’s so much tougher to come up with some interesting vibes when i am still struggling with basic chords on the 6 stringed Leah D:

It’s been the first month of the new year, and I have definately started it with a smile. Though busy schedules and budgets and life in general does weigh me down, I can’t help but keep smiling. I keep glancing on the heart on my hand and all I can do is this crooked smile :]

I ain’t ashamed…

I know I am pure cheese :D

(shout out to old drill team photos!)

Just a small life update

jL out